If I Had a Hammer

Yesterday Seth built another frame for a raised planting bed for the garden, and Myles woke up from his nap and watched from his bedroom window. He was intensely interested in what his papi was up to out there with all the banging. I explained to him that, like Bob the Builder, papi was building something out of wood, and that he was using a hammer. "Hammer" became the new word of the day, and this afternoon he went into our storage space under the house, found the hammer, and promptly went to work on the planting beds with quite a bit of banging (which occasionally produced an "ouch!"). He was actually really good with the hammer...he was able to squarely hit (repeatedly) the skinny side of a 2 X 10. It was all very impressive.

We had an excellent weekend in which I pondered aloud, over and over, why we would ever want to live anywhere but Asheville. Friday night we went to Mellow Mushroom for pizza and beer. Saturday morning we went to the Farmer's Market, which Myles now calls the "market," and bought some asparagus to test Barbara Kingsolver's theory that store-bought asparagus doesn't hold a candle to fresh, seasonal stuff straight from the ground. (Her theory held true, it was the best asparagus we'd ever had, and pretty too with some purple woven into the green). We also tried out some spinach gnocchi from a family that sells handmade pasta at the market. It was pretty incredible (and probably the most greens Myles will eat all week). Seth is interested in trying their shrimp ravioli (can you say expensive?) next. I also went for the chocolate cherry brownie that tempted me the week before. I dig the baked goods at the market!

I confess that we've been doing the whole "eat your dinner and you can have dessert" routine. I know, I know, you're not supposed to use food as a reward, and you're not supposed to use a reward to get kids to eat their food...but you know what? It works. And if the dessert keeps those sweet cheeks around a little longer, I'm a happier mama.

We did a little more planting, some bean seeds, more basil, the elder-berry bush that's been sad ever since we planted it (Seth thinks it will make a comeback). We heard on the radio that we should be pinching the blooms off of our blueberry bushes so they have a big yield next year, so we're learning.

Sunday night my friend Cindy offered this incredible yoga-to-relieve-stress class for FREE! We got lavender-rose water at the start (lavender is soothing, Myles is still into putting lavender oil on his feet after the bath) and chocolate at the finish. It was a wonderful class...I really need yoga to balance out my week, after having a toddler hanging on me, it's really a treat to just breathe deeply, stretch fully, and do something kind for my body. Cindy's a therapist who knows a lot about how to use body movements, art, and creativity to get rid of stress and work through hard stuff. I'm excited to start referring folks to her, as I do get asked for referrals as a minister.

Seth's folks and his brother Jon will be coming on Friday for the weekend...we can't wait! Myles will have a blast and it's the perfect time of the year to visit Asheville. We'll keep you posted. Have a beautiful week!

Here's To You, Mrs. Robinson

Life's been busy, and I haven't updated the blog as often as I'd like, so here are three photos of Myles. He enjoyed licking the brownie bowl, and also loves putting on my cowgirl boots (always on the wrong foot).

Mylestones: He's speaking in lots of 2-4 word sentences, counting to 14, and enjoying several one-sided phone conversations daily...the fax machine in our home office has a phone, which he loves to pick up and pretend to call either Papi, Grandpa Hendler, or Bob the Builder. In fact, we've increasingly had the problem of things getting "stuck" which necessitates a call to Bob the Builder in which we specify which of his vehicles he should bring to help fix the situation. Bob to the rescue. The other week, Myles went into our kitchen closet and emerged a few moments later with a poop in his pants and Simon and Garfunkel in his hands (we keep our cds in there)...it's the second time he's selected that cd to listen to in the last week, so I am beginning to think he may have excellent taste in music.

Seth is studying hard for the GRE. He's interested in the MPA distance program that Western Carolina offers at UNCA. He could take it slowly over the course of three or more years. He's got a great GRE study book and has been madly learning a whole new vocabulary of words that mostly I've never heard of. Smart, that one. After the vocab, it's on to tackling math.

I'm keeping very busy with the new church start. In May, June, and July we'll be having a monthly worship service and a monthly event. Our first event is a book reading at a local community center and our second one is the screening of a documentary about the eco-footprint of war, we'll be featuring the film-makers from DC. In new-church-start-speak these are "taste and see" events in which folks can come out and have a good time, bring a friend, and pick up some literature about who we are, meet Sara and I, and hear a short introduction about Land of the Sky. We are thinking the website will go up within a week or two.

Garden: Our local farmer's market began last Saturday, and I've decided that next year rather than growing from seeds, I will buy plant starts, as all their stuff looked so much more robust than the plants starting in my own garden. Last week I planted mint, basil, and cilantro as well as some more spinach and lettuce mix. Beans are next. We've been planting fools in the front yard with a native palate, including two blueberry bushes, two kinds of phlox, Jacob's ladder, and other bushes that only Seth can pronounce. We will have some beautiful hydrangeas, I'm so excited! In the fall we will plant bulbs so that next spring we will finally have some perennials. It's getting beautiful out there, and the more we plant the less grass we have to mow. Our goal is to put up a privacy fence in our backyard if we can save up enough for it. We have a total of three outdoor dogs in our neighbors' yards, and they bark and howl every time we're out there.

Well, that's the update for now. Have a lovely spring week!

Good Friday and Ghosts

Puddle diving sometimes results in funky looking outfits like this one...pajama pants and a self-selected sweater, this boy's gonna have some serious style when he grows up!

Our Good Friday's been full of glorious weather. Sunny and warm with an evening thunderstorm that somehow managed to melt into a sunset. The plants are happy. My boy who loves the puddles and the rain is happy.

A story from our week that's the stuff of baby-book chuckles: Yesterday when Myles woke up from his nap and I went in to get him the room smelled like poop. So I assumed he had a poopy diaper. As I was getting ready to transfer him to our changing cushion on the floor, he tooted loudly (yes folks, we now call them toots) and giggled. I asked him if he needed to make a poop and he said, "no!" I transfered him to the changing cushion and prepared for changing a #2 diaper duty. When I pulled off the diaper, though, it was just wet. Myles giggled and said something that sounded like "gha poop." "Do you need to poop?" I asked again. "No!" he said, "gha poop." And it dawned on me that he was saying, "ghost poop," which is what we call it when his diaper stinks like the dickens but has nothing in it but pee. "Ghost poop?" I asked. "Yes!" he giggled, "gha poop." We laughed so hard together.

Here's what church planting consists of lately:
opening a bank account
opening a p.o. box
beginning a web site
creating the first e-newsletter
visiting possible locations
designing business cards
sharing communion with the core group for the first time
putting dates on the calendar
talking about marketing and "tweets"

It's a sweet and busy life we have.

This Holy weekend I'm feeling a little exiled. I will go to an Easter service at the wonderful little church I've been attending since my time at First Congregational came to an end. And despite their incredible hospitality, I know it's not home. Planting a church doesn't often consist of as much worship and Sunday school as you crave...it requires an ability to engage in menial tasks, things you weren't trained to do in theological school. It requires more faith and trust and hope than I can sometimes muster. Oh, and patience. Where will we be next year at this time? I can't even begin to imagine. Maybe I've let my imagination muscle grow a little too weak. This is the first Good Friday maybe since before college that I haven't attended church. But I'm hopeful that with the new life of Easter this little church-dream will send down some roots and sprout high toward the sky. I'll keep you posted.

Remembering my Dad

Tomorrow marks six months since my dad's death. I will keep a candle lit all day in memory of him, and I've been mindful of other ways to honor him as well. This weekend we will finally plant a cherry tree in remembrance of my dad, a gift from many beloved ASP friends. Despite Seth's protests, it's a tree that produces edible cherries...fresh fruit from our back yard that we can enjoy year after year.

It's hard to believe it's been half a year since I've heard my dad's voice or gave him a squeeze. All the time, I'm wondering what he would think of this or what he would advise about that. What would he think about President Obama and Arne Duncan? How would he advise us in the midst of this economic downturn? What would be his commentary on tonight's game between MSU and UNC?

I'm learning that when a parent dies, the whole family system lurches. My dad was our anchor in so many ways. He was the mediator, the complimentor, the optimist. He took a genuine interest in the varied passions of his three children and six grandchildren. He loved telling the latest stories about my grandmother. He adored his wife. The wake of his loss is more than grief, it's a whole shift into a family season that's unfamiliar...

I know in my gut that one day when I think of my dad, the first thing that comes up will not be a pang of sorrow or a wave of grief, but the deep joy that comes from having a parent who has loved you well. One day it will be a light-hearted memory that rises to the surface, and I'll laugh first. But for now it's still this grief journey that accompanies me through my good days and my bad days. I miss my dad.

It's Holy Week...that week in the Christian tradition when we remember Jesus' death and resurrection. And of course that message is not lost on me. Our God is always bringing new life out of death, and there is new life all around. I'm grateful for it. But trudging through the crucifixion this year, I know so much more about death and loss and heartache. It's good to know that God's been there too.

Please send out a prayer for my family tomorrow...

Crazy Mylestones

I know we've neglected to blog as of late. But this week there have been two surprising Mylestones that I have to share! The first was earlier this week when I was driving Myles to his morning out program. He kept pointing to roads and saying "road, more road, more road" with each one we passed. I told him what road we were on and where it led (his morning out program), and then he told me "Go right!" The funny thing is he said this just before we typically turn right. I don't think he knows his right from left, but did hear Seth and I do a lot of "turn right" and "turn left" over the weekend as we were navigating. When we turn onto the road where is morning out program is he always cheers, so I know he recognizes some land marks.

The second one happened yesterday. My mom and dad got Myles a book some time ago called "The Appalachian ABCs" and each letter is paired with something Appalachian. Myles really likes the book and so we read it together often. Yesterday as we were reading it, we turned to the "P is for pottery" page and he yelled "P!" before I had the chance to say it. I was so surprised, so I started going through the book just tracing the letters and seeing if he would say them...he said "K" and "P" and "U." Tonight I asked him what each letter was and he got about 5-7. Smart cookie! There's something extraordinarily rewarding as a parent when you realize that your kid has absorbed all kinds of things you didn't realize they were learning.

The weekend was pretty good. The bad news was we didn't get to visit with my pen pal Robby because when I called to set up the appointment, he already had a visitor signed up for the week and he can only have one per week. Robby has no control over who signs up to visit him, he's just informed on visitation day that he has a visitor. So he had no idea someone had signed up to visit him and I had no way other than snail mail to tell him I couldn't come. I thought maybe being clergy would exempt me from the visitation rule, but on Friday I called for several hours and the visitation line was busy every time I called so I couldn't get through. Myles didn't sleep on Saturday (he doesn't do well when in a room with us and we were at a hotel), and so he was crabby and I think a little under the weather on Sunday. He and Seth stayed at the hotel while I went to the church to preach....which was an amazing experience! This church was a new church start ten years ago and it was an incredible blessing to see how they have grown and continue to thrive ten years out.

Backing up, on Friday we took the day off and went to Richmond to see Seth's brothers. We stayed with Greg, who officially lives in the coolest suburb I've ever been in (and I'm not a big fan of suburbs). The neighborhood is immersed in tall tall trees, with biking and running trails throughout. On Saturday morning, Seth and Greg ran in the biggest 10k in the country, and Seth placed 13th in his age group! His time was excellent. Then Jon took us out to Chuck E. Cheese as a belated birthday celebration for Myles. The highlight was that our table was next to a toddler Bob the Builder ride, which Myles went on again and again and again. Jon also had a blast with the skiball.

Church work is keeping me really busy. Happily so. All is well on that front.

Have a good night yall!