Memorial Weekend

I'm updating the blog a lot this week because I'm in need of some serious distraction as I await word on whether I will be offered this Associate Pastor position at church. The waiting is killing me. I did hear from someone who is not on the Search Committee that, in fact, they did not make a decision on Saturday and will meet again on Tuesday night. So at least I know not to expect to hear anything tomorrow. It's those little details that are so helpful in waiting this out.

This weekend our old friend Adam Schneider has been visiting with his girlfriend. I'll have to get a picture up later, because I don't think we've taken one yet. It's been very good to be back in touch with Adam as we kind of lost track over the years...Adam was on staff with Seth and I (and our friend Michelle) the summer of 1998 in Campbell County, TN when we all worked for the Appalachia Service Project. It's been ten years...hard to imagine that, and yet it does feel like a lifetime ago. So we've been enjoying learning about Adam's work with Health Care for the Homeless in Baltimore. We've also been remembering some of the more interesting stories of our time together on staff. Like the time we had a van that backfired and fire literally came out of the exhaust pipe as it made a noise that sounded like a shotgun. I'm sure we made such a good impression on the community with that one...

My sister just posted a piece on her blog about her 6 month old, Finn, trying his first solid foods. She was talking about how fast babies grow up, and it reminded me of this excerpt from my May 3rd journal entry which I thought I'd share:

"I had a really sweet moment with Myles today. He was going back and forth between the living room and the office, bringing me books to read. At one point he was headed into the living room and he paused at the door, turned back to look at me and laughed--and I saw echoes of the hundreds of times in the future when he will walk over a new threshold with that gleam in his eyes, that joy and excitement in his being, glancing back at me as he goes. It broke my heart and I cried, right there on the floor. Two minutes later he returned with a book and I gave God thanks that he is still small and in need of the very bodily love and affirmation that I am so eager to offer him."

The sweet little one is up taking his morning nap right now, and I'm going to try to clean up and get some work done while he sleeps. Happy Memorial Day...or maybe I shouldn't say "happy"...there are so many young people who are over in Iraq and Afghanistan, putting their lives on the line, and even though I think this war is unjustified and unjust, even though I think that violence is never a helpful way to work out conflict or create positive, lasting change, I do remember those who are far from home on this Memorial Day weekend and pray for an end to this war. Not only would I like to see those soldiers come home, but I would really like to see us improve the kind of care we offer to veterans when they do return, health care and mental health care and job training and educational opportunities. I think we owe this to those who are willing to risk their lives for our nation, and I'm glad to pay taxes when it goes to things like benefits for veterans. I do hope that as we are running about today enjoying family and beautiful weather and food that we will remember that we are a nation at war, and it seems that the cost of this war is falling more squarely on the shoulders of some than others. But I do wish you a good Memorial Day, because it's good for the soul to be grateful for the moments that we have with family and friends.

Helper

Friends, just a quick post to show you some shots of our new curvy sidewalk. It comes from both the street and our gravel drive, meets in the middle and goes up to the porch. Seth has been busy planting liriope along the edges of the sidewalk, and we think some day lilies will go behind that. Now we just need to get to work on a garden and compost heap! Myles has been the happy helper, anything that involves being outside, near dirt, and includes the hand shovel is an activity that can go on endlessly, ending with distressed cries when (eventually!) we have to go back inside. Here's a photo of the helpful pumpkin.

"Fired Up and Ready to Go!"

The word "candidate" has never resonated so much with me as I navigate this process of applying for the Associate Pastor position at First Congregational UCC of Asheville. A quick post to let you know that I felt like the interviews yesterday went well. I had a great time! I hope they got a sense of my excitement about the future of our congregation, I think I was able to convey my passion for ministry and the gifts and skills that I feel that I bring. Can't thank all of you enough for the kind messages you sent to me that built me up yesterday and the good energy, prayers, and love that I know were a part of me having such a wonderful day. At the end of the interview they asked, "Was this a hard day for you?" And I said, "This was an incredible day for me, it was a day when I had the opportunity to talk about my passion for the work that I do, a day when I got to be an active part of this process, a day when my family was praying for me and my friends were sending me emails telling me I'm the best thing since sliced bread...so it's been a great day!" Just to clarify: the UCC does a "search and call process" meaning that the church completes a profile, the candidates for the job complete a profile, and the search committee determines who is the best fit for the position. The search committee will be interviewing 2 more candidates, one today and one tomorrow and they will make an internal decision on Saturday. They will call the candidate mid week next week to offer the job on the condition that their selection be approved by the Executive Board (in a meeting on June 2nd) and then by 2/3rds of the congregation sometime in early-mid June. If I don't hear anything by end of business day on Friday, May 30th, that's probably a bad sign. But if I hear that I am the candidate, it will not be "official" until it's gone through both the Exec Board and a congregational vote (though in my case, I think it's safe to say those votes would be more of a formality). So that's where things stand.

Pictured above is sweet Myles and our friends Cindy and Greg who came over on Tuesday night for a beautiful meal and some quality time together. Greg is quite the story teller, and he had us literally rolling on the floor as he conveyed an awkward adolescent experience he had on a youth mission trip once...if you know Greg, you should ask him about it. Cindy was also very sweet in offering me her ever-present listening ear as I processed all that's been on my mind with church.

All is well with Myles. Seth was planting some grasses along our sidewalk last night and he said Myles was very content to be sitting in the dirt, shovel in hand, loving the outdoors.

"Da!"

Clearly we need to take some more pictures of Myles. But for today you get Juniper and her toothy grin. She's been amazing, by the way, as Myles has gotten into a habit of hitting her in the face (which I am trying very hard to teach him is not the way we treat Juniper), and she always ALWAYS backs away and removes herself from the situation. A good lesson to me, as sometimes I wish I did a better job of removing myself from hostility without lashing out.

Myles has developed three new words, "Da!" "Na!" and "Da-ah." Translation: "Da!" means "give it to me," which is really very brilliant when one considers that da in spanish literally means "give." "Na!" means "open this now!" And I'm not really sure what "Da-ah" means yet. That year of working with nonverbal developmentally disabled autistic adult men is coming in handy...I am more intuitive at figuring out what it is that he wants than I would have been without that experience. However, by and large these days, it seems that what he wants is not something he can have. This is the life of a toddler. He wants to go up and down the stairs for hours at a time, all with my help, of course. He wants to open up the granola bar that's too hard for him to eat. He wants to toss his books in the toilet or the tub. He wants to play with the digital camera and pull the table cloth off the table and empty the contents of my wallet and make the telephone beep by pressing all the numbers. He wants to stand tall in his wagon, stand up in the slippery tub, climb onto the chair or couch, stand on his rocking chair. So life can be frustrating for him...good thing we get lots of rest!

Yesterday was quite a day. I preached my last sermon as interim minister of christian education, and we had a potluck after church. Since my colleage/boss was out of town, I led service, and it still takes a lot of energy for me to do that. Just felt like a big day, and when we got home I was both exhausted and too keyed up to take a nap. We had a wedding at 4:00pm. Alli and David got married outside, right next to the river, in Swannanoa, about a 10 minute drive from Asheville. Alli looked absolutely gorgeous. David is Juniper's vet and both of them went to Mexico with us a few years back. The food was a vegetarian dream, so fresh, so raw, lots of salads and strawberries and baked brie. Myles loved the strawberries (and stained his suit, which I hope will come out with stainstick). I started feeling sick while we were there, and when Myles started breaking down at 6:30 we took our leave. By the time we got home I had a raging fever. I'm feeling much better today. I think it was just my body's way of getting out some of the stress, and letting me know that I better listen when it says "REST!"

I have an interview with the church on Wednesday for the full time Associate Pastor position, as one of the final 3 candidates. In classic church fashion, it does not simply consist of an interview. First, I meet with our Moderator (primary lay leader) tomorrow for an hour. Then, I meet with my colleague/boss for an hour on Wednesday morning. Then, I have an interview with the Search Committee. Then we all share a meal together. Talk about exhausting! But I am up for the challenge. We'll see what happens, I'm assuming I'll know one way or the other by June 15th. Please please please keep me in your thoughts and prayers this week, especially on Wednesday as this is a job I feel called to and would very much like to have. As Myles would say, "Da!" (give it to me...)

Greg and Megan's Wedding

We just returned from New Jersey where we celebrated with Seth's family as his oldest brother, Greg, married our new sister-in-law Megan. Congratulations you two!! It was a beautiful wedding, and Myles loved that it was outdoors.

We left on Wednesday afternoon and spent the night in Roanoake with our friends Ryan and Debra Fedak. Ryan's an old ASP friend, and we went out to eat with Helen and Craig (Craig was the construction consultant my very first summer on staff in 1996). Both Debra and Helen are pregnant for the first time!!

On Thursday we continued our trek up through DC, Baltimore, and beside Philly onto the NJ Turnpike. Myles was not pleased. We experienced some crying and screaming that made our heads ache. Myles has this interesting way of crying and screaming into a tongue roll...we tried to stop and take breaks as much as we could but at some point he was acting how we all felt: "I'm so sick of being in the car!!"

We arrived at Seth's parents' house in East Brunswick around 4:30pm and took a walk with David and Zoe (the dog). Later we put Myles down for the night and had dinner with Susan and David. On Friday we headed over to the hotel and settled in. The rehearsal dinner was in the Ironbound section of Newark, and Myles literally lasted about a half hour. I think he was overstimulated, with lots of people and music and activity. I took him back to the hotel and Seth stayed to be with friends and family. David offered a wonderful toast with a speech about 26.2...the magic number for Greg and Megan who will run yet another marathon in Scotland during their honeymoon.

On Saturday we went out for breakfast at the Golden Touch diner, and it was excellent! One thing we love about NJ is the pleathora of sweet diners! It was my birthday and Megan remembered and gave me a beautiful gift from Cameroon. We went to the wedding location at 3:00pm for photos. It was an outdoor wedding, which worked really well for Myles, who seemed to have a great time during the photo time, and even managed to remain quiet throughout the wedding (he also took a large poop during the ceremony, as he hung onto his stroller for dear life and got red in the face...). We enjoyed the cocktail hour, which had so much incredible food that we filled up completely. We went upstairs after that for the reception, and Myles made it through the announcement of the wedding party and the first dance. It was lots of fun. Megan looked gorgeous, Greg was happy as a clam, and it was so good to see old friends like Beth and Celia.

We left on Sunday after lunch. The rain was horrible and so was the traffic. We definitely took the wrong route, which had seemed so easy on the way up but was stop and go traffic for hours on the way back. We stayed over in Fort Royal and then drove the rest of the way back today. What a trip! Wanted to share these photos with you...

Seth's Amazing, Incredible, All-Good, Fantastic Day...He's 30!!

First, a shout out to the makers of the fabulous Bum Genius diapers, which Myles is modeling in these two photos...they are nothing short of genius, and we are loving them! They are quite expensive at $15-17 a pop, which is why it took me so long to discover them. But they are the best diaper ever, and we currently have 3 of them, we buy one every other week if we can afford to and we're trying to build up a stash. We have one that is a pocket diaper because it's adjustable size-wise and so it has two different sized inserts. Then we have two that are just all in one (i.e. no inserts and no separate cover). They are so easy, they flannel/fleec-y inside liner keeps Myles feeling dry, and they absorb a lot. So check 'em out if you've ever wanted to try cloth diapers. Here is Myles sporting his green one.

Topic Two: Michelle Obama. She was at UNCA on Friday night, and so Myles and I strolled on over and met up with Seth when he got off of work. She was brilliant! I have never heard her speak (since we don't watch tv much), and she was funny, intelligent, articulate, real, dynamic...she began by acknowledging that UNCA is a community in mourning. She knew about the recent death of a graduate who slipped on a rock while hiking up a water fall, and thanked us for hosting her at in the wake of this tragedy. It was a windy day and at one point her dress, which came to the knee, was blowing around a bit, and she grabbed it and held it down and made a joke about "I'm not gonna be caught on Youtube." Gladys Knight opened with a roaring rendition of America, America. And then Michelle was talking about how she grew up, in a working class family with a dad who worked for the city all his life (back then you could support a family on four with one city income) and also had M.S. We had to leave early due to Myles' bedtime, but I was very impressed with all that I heard and saw. Seth and I took advantage of NC early voting last week, so we won't have to wait in line on Tuesday.

Finally: Seth turns 30!!! The old man finally caught up to me...yesterday was his "fantastic day" in which I asked him to plan nothing but be ready for anything. The morning started with a blueberry and chocolate chip pancake breakfast with the Burnet family (complete with fresh whipped cream that Colleen made on the spot and strawberries). After they left, Seth actually had to go to work. For those of you who don't yet know, Seth took a second job at TGI Fridays to help us make ends meet with my church job ending on May 30th. So Seth worked from 10:30-4:00pm, and then I whisked him away over to the local disc golf course, where Hugh, Michael, and Tom showed up to play 9 holes with him. He came home and we went out to dinner at Heiwa (where we had our first date almost 8 years ago) for some sushi. Myles was a little tired, but did just fine. And just when Seth thought that the day of surprises was over, Hugh and Tom came back to our house and picked him up for an evening on the town! He had a fantastic day, and received several phone calls and voice messages today with family members (who will not be named) singing happy birthday a bit off key. Happy 30th Seth, we love you!!